don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Randomize