eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize