Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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