so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Randomize