Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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