I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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