Sponge bath it is.
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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