I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
