Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Randomize
