who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Randomize
