he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
She even gives head with a lisp.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
