i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
No subtext here. People are naked.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Randomize