Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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