Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Too much gin, very little bucket
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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