i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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