did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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