I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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