i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
