wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
