we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
