so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
