I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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