i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
i believe in u and ur pee
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
