Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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