I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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