But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
