we have officially lost it.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Randomize
