Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Randomize
