it glows. i had to have it.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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