ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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