problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Randomize
