You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
