That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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