D3 body, D1 cock
I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
