I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
