I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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