so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Randomize
