R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Randomize
