I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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