so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
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