Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
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