is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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