i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
