Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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