glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
i will never coherently bang her
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
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