oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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