Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
