And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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