Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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