He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
